Can’t fall asleep, no matter what you do?
Even if you don’t underrate the importance of sleep, like most people do (blah blah, better skin, energy, mental acuity, blah blah blah), there are times when you do everything right and sleep just… won’t come. So what do you do?
Here are 21 tips and techniques to help you to fall asleep when you can’t seem to catch those zz’s.
Techniques at bedtime to help you fall asleep.
These are some in-bed, right-before-sleep things to do that have been proven to help people (like me!) finally fall asleep.
1. 4-7-8 breathing.
It sounds way too simple to work. But it does. Seriously. This might be the best way to instantly fall asleep I know.
Here’s what you do: You breathe in for four seconds, hold for seven, and exhale for eight. Repeat three more times, then breathe normally before trying again.
Ideally, you want to inhale through your nose and exhale through your mouth, but I find this much more pleasant to do by putting the tip of my tongue behind my teeth, essentially blocking air flow into my mouth. This way, you’re not opening and closing your mouth, just moving your tongue slightly.
The 7-second hold, though, is really where the magic happens. Apparently, it allows the oxygen to circulate in your body, which relaxes you. And it does. You can feel it, almost instantly. I’ve fallen asleep before I managed to finish the four breaths.
2. Watch Bob Ross (or something).
Okay, it doesn’t have to be Bob Ross, but seriously, he works. If you know who he is, head on over to Netflix and pull up old episodes of his painting show and lie back in calm amusement of happy trees.
If you do not know who he is, look him up and prepare to be amazed and perplexed. You may not find his paintings at the Louvre, but it’s damn satisfying to watch a blank canvas become a mountain scene in a matter of minutes, and it’s relaxing to boot.
This is how I fall asleep. Not always to Bob Ross, but always watching something on my iPad. The trick is, though, that it can’t be too violent, scary, negative or dramatic. (I used to watch The Walking Dead close to bedtime and that turned bad FAST.)
I know, I know—the experts say to unplug before bedtime (see #20, below). If you have actual insomnia (I don’t), and you don’t get tired or fall asleep watching television, movies or videos, then heed their advice. But if not, it’s a really nice way to snuggle in and get sleepy.
3. Reading.
Reading, however, is generally better at allowing you to fall asleep when you’re having trouble. It requires more imagination, which is likely to tire your brain, and if you’re using an actual book (not a tablet or phone), then you aren’t stimulating your mind with all that blue light and micro-flashing that interferes with melatonin production.
Plus, reading is pretty great and gives you bragging rights.
4. Take a bath.
Taking a bath at bedtime does more than just relax the muscles. It also helps cool the body, which helps the onset of the sleep cycle. The optimal time is about 90 minutes before bed, so you have plenty of time to still knock off other techniques on this list.
5. Immerse your face in cold water.
By immersing your face in cold water for about 30 seconds, you can trigger what’s called the Mammalian Drive Reflex, which slows the heart rate and lowers blood pressure. It also soothes anxiety, a known sleep-killer.
6. Lavender aromatherapy.
You’ve heard that lavender helps with sleep and anxiety, but it’s not just an old wives tale. There are studies to prove it.
Pick up some lavender essential oil and put a few drops in your bedtime bath, in a diffuser for your toom, in a linen spray bottle, or in some lotion to moisturize before bed. Lush even has a lotion specifically for this purpose. Just be sure to dilute any essential oil before putting it directly on your skin.
Lavender is the most-studied in aromatherapy, as well as being pretty plentiful, but there are other scents you can try as well.
7. Acupressure.
Acupressure follows the same methodology as acupuncture, where the body has several meridians running chi throughout the body. Pressing on and stimulating certain points in the body can help replenish the chi and clear blockages.
There are several spots that help one to fall asleep, so do an internet search to find more. The most common I found were:
- Spirit Gate (HT7/Shen Men), located at the crease on your outer wrist, below your pinkie finger.
- Yin Tang, located between your eyebrows, above your nose.
- Tai Chong, located between where your big toe and second toe connect.
8. Warm hands and feet
We all like warm and toasty feet in bed, but apparently, it helps you to sleep better, too. When we sleep, the body core temperature drops a couple of degrees. The faster this temperature drops, the faster we get sleepy. Warming the feet opens up the blood vessels and allows the core of the body to cool and heat to redistribute that much faster.
Subjects who wore warm socks to bed were able to fall asleep faster, sleep longer, and wake up less in the night.
Don’t like socks in bed? Me neither. Try a hot water bottle.
9. Meditation, sleep or hypnosis soundtracks.
Ever try to “meditate” while still lying down and end up napping instead? Put that power to good use! If you do a search on YouTube, there are thousands of free meditation tracks with soothing sounds to relax your mind and body. Unlike meditation, however, don’t sit up. Get as comfortable as you can lying on your back.
Hypnosis tracks are also great to help you fall asleep because they are made to make you do just that. And maybe you’ll treat some anxiety or ailment in the meantime.
10. Positive visualization.
If you find yourself awake in the wee hours of the morning, most likely, you’re experiencing anxious thoughts. First of all, do your best to ignore them. They won’t be there in the same ferocity in the morning, and they’re lies. Lies! I tell you! Lies!
Visualization is a helpful tool for many, oh, so many, reasons. But I have personally found that it relaxes me and gets me out of my negative anxiety thinking loop, letting my mind ease up and rest.
When you find yourself unable to fall asleep, just imagine something really easy that brings you pleasure. It could be something you want, somewhere you like to go, or a person you love very much. Just make sure it’s nice and easy. You might feel some resistance at first—fight through it. Just strong-arm the positivity. Eventually the negative thought-loops will dissipate.
11. Take a non-addictive sleeping aid.
A sleeping aid like CBD or melatonin can help your body prepare for sleep that much easier. However, they won’t knock you out on their own. This is a good thing. If you rely on an outside source to do it for you, your body is all, “Oh, you got this? Cool. I won’t bother.”
CBD is very gentle, and it really eases anxiety more than promotes sleep. Melatonin, or other sleep aids like Night Rest, might make you a little more groggy in the morning. The way I experience them working is like this: Imagine a door, and through that door is sleep. The sleep aids get you right up to the door, but they don’t open it and push you inside.
12. Have bed-time.
Carve out at least 30 minutes to cozify in your bed. Don’t just go to bed at bedtime and try to fall asleep or pass out. Make it a segment of your day. That way, you send a signal to your brain that it’s time to wind down.
13. White noise.
If you’re a light sleeper, white noise might help you fall asleep and stay sleep. White noise is a random signal having the same intensity across multiple frequencies. You can find white noise on YouTube, or you could put a fan on.
Tips for a better sleeping cycle.
The above are bedtime tips to help you fall asleep within the minute or the hour. But there are general life habits that will help with your overall sleep cycle, too.
14. Don’t sleep in.
Don’t do it. Not all the time, anyway. The best way to get a good night’s sleep is to go to bed 7-8 hours before you have to wake up in the morning. If you’re catching up on sleep, wake up early and let your body fall in line the following night. If you sleep in, you’re prompting a late-night, late-morning schedule.
15. Restrict alcohol before bed.
Disclaimer: I’ve been alcohol-free for about two and a half years. So yeah, I’m biased, but I’m also very well aware of the tenuous relationship between alcohol, alcohol withdrawal, and sleep.
First of all, alcohol decimates your ability to get a good night’s rest. It reduces your body’s melatonin production, disrupts the body’s circadian functioning, and causes your body to shift to lighter sleep or wake up once the alcohol metabolizes.
But you don’t need to quit drinking! If you have a glass in the evening, make sure you have it early enough so that it metabolizes before you fall asleep. If you use it as a sleep aid, you’re more likely to become dependent on it as such.
16. Limit caffeine.
I love my caffeine (*sips coffee*). Just don’t have it later in the day. Ideally, make it a morning ritual only. If you really need it later in the day, don’t have any after 4 PM. The later you have it, the more likely it will affect your ability to get fall asleep naturally.
17. Exercise.
Exercise has long been known to help you get a better night’s sleep. Some studies also suggest you should stay away from it close to bedtime. And, of course, it has loads of other benefits, too.
18. Don’t lie awake in bed.
The more you can associate the bed with sleep, the better. If you lie awake in bed, you’re sending a signal to your body and mind that the bed isn’t only for sleep.
I find that I fall asleep much faster if I break out my iPad and and attempt to re-tire myself. If that doesn’t work, the experts suggest getting up and moving to a different room for a calming activity before returning to bed to fall asleep.
19. Tend to your mental health.
People with mental health issues (which are most of us) usually have trouble sleeping. And lack of sleep exacerbates or causes mental health issues. I’m not saying I have a specific answer here (I don’t), but if you have depression, anxiety, or some mental health issues of any kind, get help. It will help your life, and it will most definitely help your sleep. Especially if anxious or negative thoughts are keeping you awake.
20. Disconnect from electronics before bed.
Yeah. [Sigh.] It’s apparently true that devices like phones and tablets that give off blue light interfere with the body’s ability to make melatonin, which helps you fall asleep. So if this is your bedtime ritual, and you have insomnia, try trading in the iPad for a book.
For what it’s worth, I nod off every night to my iPad, and haven’t ever noticed a difference between TV, reading, iPads or actual books. But that doesn’t mean it won’t affect you. Try it and see.
21. Relax, and know that imperfect sleep is still rest.
Just know that your worst-case scenario is not as bad as you think. Lying in bed all night without sleep still rests your body. While you don’t get the same benefits as a full night’s sleep, it’s not the same as staying actively awake.
What’s the point of saying this? If you’re lying in bed awake, you are probably having anxious thoughts about the lack of sleep you’re getting, which only makes the situation worse. If you can reduce that anxiety, eventually you should fall asleep.